Hear Me Out: The Birth Order Theory Is the Key to Figuring Out 'The White Lotus' Killer

If you're anything like me, then after watching each episode of The White Lotus you immediately reach for your phone to Google the all important questions, like: Where have I seen the actor who plays Lochlan Ratliff before? Where can I buy a Parker Posey-inspired nightgown? And wait, what exactly is Lorazepam?

But the real question—the one that’s been haunting us since episode one—is: Who’s responsible for all that shooting (and the floating body)? While my colleague Abby Hepworth recently presented a very compelling theory all about the power of three, I have a different one—and it all comes down to birth order. Specifically, the Ratliff siblings.

The idea is simple: Where you land in the sibling lineup shapes your personality. So let’s apply that to our favorite messy family, shall we?

Saxon, aka the Oldest Child

Saxon is the poster child for firstborn energy: loyal, achievement-oriented, hyper-masculine. And, as evidenced by his attempts to turn his little brother into a protein-shake-chugging alpha, he also embodies the most toxic trait of firstborns—controlling as hell.

Piper, aka the Middle Child

Sweet Piper, our classic middle child. She is diplomatic, conflict-avoidant and the peacemaker (I mean, she's literally trying to enroll in a Buddhist temple). She also is running away from her family and life back home (not that we blame her), which according to the @sibling_lady on TikTok, is a classic middle child move.

Lochlan, aka the Youngest Child

Now here's where it gets interesting. Lochlan is the youngest child, which according to the birth order theory (and every younger sibling I know), means he should be the carefree, attention-seeking and rebellious one. Except, well, he's not. Instead Lochlan is introverted, accommodating, quiet and kind. And yet, he's also deeply troubled (remember when he watched his big brother do you-know-what in episode one?).

Lochlan is the rebellious youngest child—but he’s just been saving it for the season finale. He’s the one who fires the gun. Maybe it’s intentional. Maybe it’s an accident. Maybe he’s pushed into it by his domineering older brother. Maybe he does it to protect his family (I could see a kerfuffle between Tim and Gaitok over the gun and Loch getting in the way). Either way, his unique place in this dysfunctional family makes him the perfect candidate to absolutely lose his sh*t. And admit it, sweet Lochlan being the killer would be just surprising enough to shock viewers, something that The White Lotus does all too well.

Now I just need to figure out who that is floating in the water...