I Love You, Jennifer Garner, But This Thriller Might Be the Worst Movie You Ever Made

I consider myself a huge Jennifer Garner stan, and I'm not just talking about 13 Going on 30 (which she recently brought back for Halloween). She's incredible in Alias, which I've watched all the way through several times. She can bring me to tears with nuanced performances like her role in Love, Simon. She steals the show in Wolverine & Deadpool. She knows how to keep me on the edge of my seat à la The Last Thing He Told Me, which is coming back for season two. I even love one of her most critically-panned films, Elektra. But, I'm sorry to say, they can't all be winners.

For the record, my less-than-positive reaction to her (potentially) worst film has nothing to do with its 13 percent rating on Rotten Tomatoes. It's just...not as good as the rest of her cannon. I'm, of course, talking about 2018's Peppermint.

And it's not Garner's fault, but the film's dialogue is...rough. Don't believe me? Take a look at the trailer. Now, revenge movie dialogue is never award-winning, but the things they make Garner say are particularly cringey. My favorite (AKA least favorite) lines from the trailer: "Corrupt judges...dirty cops...What do I want? I want justice." Come on, guys. That's the premise of literally every movie made in the '90s and early '00s. We can't be a little more creative with the dialogue when we have a massive talent like Garner to work with?!

I'm also willing to suspend disbelief to a certain degree. After all, I love a superhero movie (especially if Garner is in it). But—and I won't give spoilers about the "climactic" scene of the movie—the idea that a former "regular person" with a revenge-seeking makeover can single-handedly take down dozens of trained cartel members and corrupt bad guys? Sigh. It's just a lot to swallow here. (Again, maybe if I had seen her training montage or something, I'd buy it more?)